Some of the downsides...

First off, let me just say, there is NOT any downside to hosting a Foreign Exchange student, or having Yuka here. But some things (particularly just with school) have been more challenging than others!

Yuka's been here for almost 4 weeks now! And every day we still laugh, learn, and have fun together! We just have learned so much from each other about culture, life, and love!

Over the past 3 weeks we've really only had one issue: Science class!

I ranted about it on my Facebook one day, but honestly. I'm not sure how certain teachers can be so closed-minded! Up until yesterday (September 6th), Yuka did not have a positive report about the class whenever I asked! She had seen the Guidance counselor 3 times, we had e-mailed the teacher numerous times, and we were not getting anywhere. We seriously were getting ready to move her out of the class!

The teacher wasn't willing to assist. In a Science class where words like "posterior" and "connective tissue" are not every day words, ANY student needs more background knowledge of these terms before truly understanding them! Well first, Yuka was partnered with a "mean girl." Every time Yuka asked to see her paper, the girl would turn around and ignore her. So frustrating! We asked for her seat to be moved - which the teacher took an additional 4 days to do!

After that nightmare, Yuka received a so/so grade on a Notebook check (keeping up with notes, table of contents, etc), but it was graded by a classmate who didn't realize the verbal agreements the teacher made with her. For example, you don't need to complete this part of the notebook since you don't have time. :( So she's working hard and staying after school to get the work done and improve her grade.

Then, while she was moved, her second partner acted as if Yuka did not know any English! She took total control of the assignment and said, "I'll do the work for you." But that's not what Yuka wanted! She actually wants to participate and help out! She WANTS to understand, but she just needs someone caring enough to do it!

We just didn't understand why a teacher would be so far removed from a student's success or struggle in her classroom! I mean, I'm a teacher and I NEVER want to see any of students struggle! Then a few "Aha's" came to light - the teacher had a new baby 5 months ago and leaves campus at lunch time to see her, doesn't come in until the bell rings, doesn't stay after school except for 2 days... What a frustrating situation!

Anyway - all to say that we finally got things worked out. I had to e-mail her to tell her great strategies to use for Yuka (thankfully I am a teacher). Told her things like give us vocab before hand, give us a study guide for her test, use Thinking Maps, partner her up with a better partner (duh)... So Yuka has had 2 good days in Science!

But to add to the cluelessness of the teacher, the Japanese culture is a very clean and tidy culture. Most of them wear masks over their face even if they are not sick (just because of population, the proximity of all the people together, etc.)  Well - Yuka asked the teacher to come over to explain something more to her. She does, but she's in the middle of eating a snack. Which, by the way, children are not allowed to eat in the science lab - the teacher should lead by example! Anyway...the teacher takes one last bite of her food, brings it with her and then places the food on Yuka's schoolwork! Her half-eaten snack, right on Yuka's personal papers. All while eating and explaining the work to her. That's a huge no-no in the Japanese culture.

Enough about that topic, another funny challenge is sarcasm. We explained to Yuka was sarcasm was, she understood (Kind of like Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory). So every time we hear sarcasm or say something sarcastically we say, "That was sarcasm." or Yuka's picked up a few times and says, "Oh, sarcasm?!" Ha... So we were having our regular conversations, something about a very common topic, let's say lightning and thunder.. So I jokingly say to Brian, "Oh ya, you know lightning and thunder outside" and Brian responds, "Uh, what's that." The look on Yuka's face was hilarious! She immediately said, "YOU DON'T KNOW THAT!!!!" And we started laughing, then she realized "Ohhh, sarcasm." But, it's always a reminder of what we say and what we mean.

And we have told her about idioms, that she enjoys also - "Hit the lights" "Let the cat out of the bag" "Hold your horses" "Hit the hay"

Overall, there haven't been any other challenges. We absolutely adore her SAT Prep/World History teacher. She's an Eagles fan go figure, but she is also just an amazing person. So we e-mail her on a weekly basis reminding her of how awesome she is, how she's leaving a positive impact of America on Yuka, etc.

Homework is always fun - once we get done with Summer project (Yuka has 4 weeks to complete the project that everyone else [native English speakers] had 9 weeks to complete, but we are trudging through it and should be done by Sunday!).

Now I will leave you with some FUN memories!!

Pastor Don is turning 60 on Tuesday, so our family made him some origami with his favorite life verse in Japanese!

 So tired after playing Tag with the whole family!

Yuka started her exercising/dieting plan (LOL).. She is teaching Emily some moves!

Then Emily lost focus!

 More yoga.. the girls say, "I can do that!"

Relaxing with dad, and midnight conversations about any and all topics! 

Sushi making!

We stayed home from school because of an incident near the school.. so we went shopping and to the Disney Store!

First Few Weeks - Done!

We are a little over 3 weeks as a new family of 6!

For the most part, our family has adjusted quite well to having a new person here. The girls instantly formed an attachment to Yuka. I think we hyped her up so much to the girls, having a 'new' big sister, flying in on an airplane, coming from Japan... that the girls were just READY to meet her.

We welcomed Yuka at the airport with signs saying "Welcome Yuka" in Japanese! The girls each held a sign and were jumping up and down when they saw her! We quickly gave Yuka a tour of the house, dropped everything off insides and went out to each. She had been traveling since 9 that morning and had very little (pretzels or peanuts) to eat on the flight. We went to good ole Chili's! 

After lunch, we came home and helped get Yuka unpacked. We then had to run off to the doctor's office so Yuka could start school that Monday! We had to get all of her Japanese documents translated into American paperwork that I could take to the school Monday AM. After we did that, we came home and relaxed.

That Sunday was another busy day. Church, school-supply shopping, food shopping, uniform trying on, prepping for the first day of school. But we made it. And we successfully managed the first day and weeks of school! We are just about a month into school already!

One adjustment still in the process is nap time. Our girls are going through that stage where they think they don't need naps anymore. So, come 4:30-5:00, they are miserable, cranky, and tired. 

One adjustment for Yuka, I believe, is the noise level. In Japan, Yuka lives with her mom, although she often visits her grandparents. Besides the kindergarten students that Yuka plays with on the weekend from her mom's school, having 3 loud, obnoxious 2 and 3 year olds is quite overwhelming. Don't get me wrong, she adores the times she spends with the girls and playing with them, but come 8:00 when its silent and peaceful, she is just as happy as us! :D 

I would love to say that the next weekend after our first was more relaxed.. but nope.

On Friday we went to Disney Springs, for some shopping, music, and some free Disney experiences! Yuka was able to meet Grandma for the first time! 

Saturday morning we took Yuka to meet my Dad and Dorothy. The girls had so much fun playing with their big sister in my dad's pool!

We left my dad's then had a birthday party for one of the girl's friends, Jack. So Yuka then got to meet most of our friends that afternoon, as well as experience an American birthday party! In Japan, most people don't have a birthday party. They have cupcakes in school and that's about it. So to see a full blown baseball birthday party, with cake, 50 people, party games, food, was quite an experience!

Then Sunday, we had church and went to Brian's dads for Great Grandpa's birthday! She got to meet most of his side of the family there! 

Nothing like meeting most of the entire family in one weekend, right?! Not to overwhelming! ;-) 

Yuka said the one thing she loved about America is how everything is so much more "family oriented." That in Japan, most people want to be left alone or left with their friends. They don't have a lot of "family" holidays or gatherings. 

Thankfully the next weekend wasn't as busy. We went to the Premium Outlet malls over by us and got some shopping in! :) We were able to score a pair of Adidas sandals for $7, while Yuka got a pair of Adidas hi-top shoes for $16! She was so excited! 

Finally, we made it to this weekend! We had Family Game night where Yuka was able to meet some more family (My brother, Kenny, and that part of the family!). We also enjoyed going to Disney on Ice, thanks to Grandma giving the girls their birthday present early! Everyone had such a blast, especially being minutes from the Amway arena! 

Next time I write, I'll post about some of the challenges we've had in the past 3 weeks! But for now, we are loving all of the family time we are having! 

Another addition!

Our life has completely changed since the last time I wrote. It's weird to see how much has changed in just over a year!

Let me recap:

• We sold our house and moved into a bigger house!
• We transitioned our old life on the East side of Orlando to downtown Orlando, where our house is just over a mile away from our Central church location!
• We started homeschooling the girls, 90 minutes a day using ABC Jesus Loves Me. So far, we've completed 9 weeks of school, learned 5 bible verses, almost all our letters, numbers to 20, shapes, colors and more! The hardest part is getting back into the swing of it since summer, and figuring out our schedule...This year we are moving it to 2 hours of school a day!
• We started to make headway in a normal life routine! 

Then, we went to a Home school conference and spoke with a Foreign Exchange table (back story on that in a minute)...and from there we made a brand new, life changing decision... 

We decided to host a foreign exchange student! 

Now, this wasn't just because of the conference, it actually was stirred up before then. But God finalized our plans through the conference! 

It all started when Brian and I began learning our respective languages (Japanese & Italian). We wanted to take our learning to the next level, which of course, is conversation. At my MOPS group, I was talking with my table moms about us learning a language and someone mentioned hosting a foreign exchange student. I thought that was a neat idea, posed it to Brian and he was shocked I was interested! But of course, he was all in. At that point, we decided we would not do it right away, I mean come on, we still have 3 toddlers growing and changing every day. 2 of them were still peeing the bed at night, and one we just started potty-training!

Well, at the Homeschool conference we decided to visit the booth for CCI-Greenheart, a foreign exchange program. The coordinator was surprised when she asked us, "Ever consider hosting a foreign exchange student?" and we answered, "YES!" We told her we were interested in a girl only, and this time around, from Japan. She showed us 1 teenager who just fell perfectly inline with our family. 1) She loves to dance, 2) She loves to bake, 3) She loves to learn english. The coordinator kept pushing us to sign up, but again, hesitant because our family wasn't ready for this change yet, but we said we only wanted HER if we did do it this year. We were also concerned about the school, and we wanted to make sure that she could attend a specific charter school instead of the one we are zoned for.

The next day, the coordinator called us, she said that she was waiting to hear back from the charter school and if they would accept a foreign exchange student. She asked us to complete the first step - registering online. We did, just to have our name in the database, for future reference.

A day later the school got back with our coordinator. They would accept her! We just needed to complete the "Interest form" and turn it into the school. The coordinator then asked us to complete the ENTIRE form to move forward.

This is when we really started praying about it. Are we really ready to have another person in our life for a year? Can we financially afford another person? 

Well, after 2 days of praying about it, and avoiding phone calls from the coordinator, we decided to go ahead and do it! We completed the form. We finished our background check. We selected our girl-if we didn't get her, then we would stop pursuing the exchange program at this time! Thankfully, we were paired immediately with Yuka (the one we fell in love with!) 

And then everything was set in stone. The balls were rolling, flights were scheduled, and e-mail communication began.

This blog is to share our newest journey with you! Our life over the next 10 months as a host family with our foreign exchange student! My goal will be to post every week, have Yuka write a little in Japanese - have both perspectives, and just let you know about our Host family experience! 

'Til next time friends, I can't wait for you to join us on our journey!

Prepping for Delivery

Prepping for Delivery as my best friend is about to become a mommy in under 3 short months! 

As I was preparing the shower for Gen and baby Lucy, I thought about advice I could give her. Now, to be fair, I have had 2 c-sections, so vaginal birth isn't my forte (although I have heard some women poop as they push the baby out). :)

1) A few items To-Do before labor...Go out to eat as a couple one last time, get a nice pedicure (because you will be staring at your feet in the hospital bed for at least 3 days), and clean the house once over before you leave, so you don't have a mess when you come home from the hospital!

2) Pack essentials, leave the rest at home, and bring empty bags to stock up. I'm serious. Don't bring but 1-2 pairs of underwear because the hospital has some and you don't want yours to get dirty. Bring a few pairs of clothes (tank tops, loose shirts, and loose pants), comfy socks. Cell phones and chargers, camera, baby book, tooth brush, tooth paste (and make-up if you want), hair brush. Your nursing pillow, and it may help to bring your own pump just in case all of the hospital pumps are checked out and you need some help. Baby's going home outfit and any bow you want her to wear. And that's all... The hospital has all the diapers you need, the formula and nipples if needed. Now, bring 2-3 extra bags for diapers, birth clothes, toiletries, formula from the hospital. Even if you don't use it - ask for an extra case of formula. If you need to supplement you won't need to buy it right away, and if you don't use it..gift it to another momma!

3) Be sure to ask for a breast pump kit. And even if you don't need it, ask to see the lactation nurse. She will give you lots of free tips. It's her job to help you in the hospital (you pay for it in your hospital bill)...if you don't talk with her now and have questions later, it will cost you additional money. So why not use this tool while you have it in the hospital.

4) The lactation nurse will tell you breastfeeding isn't supposed to hurt..Well it will for a few days..Think about it..our boobs aren't used to having someone pull at them every 3 hours..so yes, they will hurt. There were days when I dreaded having Gemma latch on... for the first two weeks it hurt for the first 5-10 minutes of her breast feeding, then calmed down..and then after those first two weeks, we were good to go.

5) You will bleed for days, and days, after delivery. It's kind of like your period making it up to you for the past 9 months. The hospital will give you lovely pads to wear in your provided knitted underwear. Some bleeding lasts a week, others last 5 weeks...Some bleeding slows down and then gets heavy again, some stays heavy the entire time. It's lovely, really. *Side note - The hospital does provide a squirt bottle for easier cleaning. This may become one of your favorite tools!

6) Don't be afraid to let it all out. Seriously. If you thought your doctor seeing your down there was fun...Your who-ha becomes the talk of the hospital..Doctors, nurses (they change shifts twice), etc. Nurses have to check for dilation, they pinch you with pliers after your epidural, they clean you...and then husbands take over the nurses role selflessly when you are too sore to do it. I think one of the most humbling things is to be in pain, having your husband help you wipe and clean "down there" because you can't bend over or move. 

7) Be clear about visitors. If you only want close friends and family state that. If you want to say "I'll let you know when I want visitors" be firm about when people can come. You don't need your former boss or old students' families coming to visit you when you're not feeling 100% yourself.

8) Utilize the nursery - primarily at night time. While we kept all of our girls with us during the day, we specifically asked the nurses to take them during the night. It is a HUGE adjustment. The baby's nurse will bring her to you (ever 2-3 hours) when she needs to feed at night time. So that alone will make you tired, rest up during those 2 hours you don't have her. Trust me, you will have plenty of cuddle times and sleepless nights when you wish you could send the baby to the nursery to have someone just be with her.

9) You get a nurse and the baby gets a nurse. The only one who doesn't get a nurse is the hubby, unless he feels faint - like Brian did during Gemma's delivery...but you have a great team surrounding you throughout the birth and post-delivery.

10) Order one last meal before the cafe closes for the night. This will help you during your late night feedings where you want something to munch on (breastfeeding makes you a ravenous beast). If you don't order something the most your nurse can get you is an icee or water..so order from the cafe before they close! And again, your meals are included in your hospital stay!  

11) The Witching Hour. Every baby gets it. Really. It's a time when they just cry for no reason, nothing helps, you think its gas but you've done everything your little heart can to try and get the gas out. You've made sure they're clean, they're fed, they're swaddled..and Nothing works. Honestly, it's the most trying time in Brian and I's marriage. Normally this happens between month 1 and month 2. For the twins it was between 1 am and 2 am..which made it VERY hard on Brian and I - since he was working. For Gemma it was more between 10 pm - 11 pm. During the Witching Hour, we discovered Allison loved the repetition of our voices (repeating the same 3 phrases to her), Emily loved to just swing, and Gemma loved to take a shower (we eventually just put the sound of the shower running on our phones and let her rest). 

12) Swaddling is not the end all be all. Some babies will kick out of it by week 1 and just prefer to be free. We swaddled all of our girls for maybe the first week or two after the hospital...after that they just wanted to be covered gently.

13) This will be the hardest moments in your marriage, but also some of the greatest moments. When I look back at the witching hour times, or when I just needed a moment not be "needed" by someone or something and I lashed out at Brian, it was rough. Trust me. To the point where we had newborn twins and I was screaming at him that I could handle this myself and to sign the papers, we're done. It was ugly. But I look back and think about the way Brian holds the girls, how he adores them and they adore him..It is all worth it. And to know that your husband and you made this Godly creation...wow. So yes, your marriage will have ugly moments, but forgive and remember that this moment in Lucy's life will only last a little while.

14) Lucy is adjusting to the world all while you are adjusting to her. She doesn't know what to do. She doesn't understand night, day, pooping, peeing...She knows she's hungry, she's wet, she wants love. Whatever you're doing at that moment is the RIGHT thing. She knows YOU as much as you know yourself. She has felt your tension for the past 9 months, she felt your excitement for the past 9 months...she also knows your voice the best (because she's heard it the most). So as long as she's around you she's going to feel safe, secure, and loved.

Lastly, 15) Utilize the team around you. I promise you there are people who would give the world to help you. They start with Erik, your mom and brother, and me! So seriously, ask us for anything. If you need an hour to sleep, we can be there. House cleaning (we may not do it as good as you, but we surely can try our best!), anything! Your hormones are still going to be haywire for a few weeks, but us women understand that (and the men will get over it quickly). 

So Gen, enjoy these last few months being Erik and you. I love you and I am over the moon excited to welcome Lucy into the world! 

Finding Myself

I've told you all before, I've always been a blogger. I have been posting in my "Deadjournal" since the ripe age of seventeen. 

Recently, I reread my journey from 2002 and on. And it leaves me speechless. Rather, I say, "Wow." I was boy-crazy, immature, had low self-esteem, struggled with family, friends, and God, ultimately trying to find myself along the way. But I feel like I've overcome, whatever it is called, being beautiful and accepting where I am in life.

I think having a "normal" childhood would lend to typical woes along the teenage and college years. Typical circumstances: boyfriends, independence, success, etc. But I hardly had that. 

When I was eleven, my family left my mom in New Jersey to better ourselves. Leaving my mom to decide to join us and leave her alcoholic tendencies or stay in New Jersey and be deprived of any family with us. 

What did she choose? Alcohol. Her paramour. Leaving behind three children and a husband of almost 20 years.

Not only from the age of eleven did I have to struggle with no longer having a mother in my life, I also had to find acceptance and friendships in a foreign land, Florida. Whatever sense of comfort and peace I had known was no longer there, even at times I questioned why my dad decided to do this. 

Thankfully, two years after we moved to Florida, God directed my steps to a wonderful group of friends. I'm not sure where I would be today without the support of them. On a regular day at school, this group of girls (whom I had just recently started to get to know) began sharing the gospel with one of their guy friends. He wasn't terribly interested in what they had to say, but I on the other hand. I was so intrigued by this God who loved you no matter what (at this point I clearly needed to be loved because I was that "girl who didn't have a mom"), who wanted to forgive your sins and spend eternity with you. I prayed with the girls and accepted Jesus into my heart. I started going to church youth group with them on Wednesday nights and received counseling from the youth pastor about my parents divorce. 

Throughout high school and college, I sought acceptance and love from whomever would give it. I also expected loyalty, from any and all I confided in. My deepest struggle was allowing anyone to get close to me. I'm a listener by nature, so sharing was never a strength. So I always allowed others to open up to me without reciprocating the relationship. This type of relationship is great if you're trying to close a business deal or wanting to know the latest gossip. People love to talk. I believe there are more "talkers" in the world than there are "listeners." I also didn't open up to those around me because I had been burned. If the one person who was supposed to love me no matter what, my mother, could abandoned me, why would anyone want to accept me with my flaws? I think my listening nature plus the hurt I endured from my mother, led me to be closed off to so many who did truly accept me throughout these years.

Reading through those ten years of journals, I wanted so much to have that guy to rely on. In fact, I tried so hard to rely on him that I often neglected relying truly on God. It's so funny, becoming a Christian early in life (because let's be honest, age 12 is pretty early in life) you always hear, "Only God can fill the hole in your heart" or "Man will not meet every expectation." Why didn't I remember those throughout those years? Looking back now, God clearly slapped me in my face on numerous occasions to say, "Kim, **** will not fulfill you, only I can." (**** being any name or *him* nickname I decided on for my new crush.) In my journals, I struggled almost daily with the fact that my own boyfriend didn't want to spend time with me. Yet ignoring the whispers of God saying, "Just spend some time with me." 

Thankfully, I did have some tremendous friends who I could connect with. And even though at the time, I only saw half of these friendships as valuable, I can look back now and thank numerous friends who stood by me. Friends that no matter where they are in life today, I can look at and admire, smile, and show my appreciation for them sticking it out with me. Even though I was surrounded by groups of people in high school and college, I never felt like I had enough acceptance. I always felt like I was the outcast, the one who "didn't grow up in the church" or have christian parents. Although no one said that, it was my inner demons reminding me that I'm not good enough. And I so often let those demons win me over. I always needed to prove something to someone. 

I had leaders who were willing to love me and invest their life into me, even when I didn't want it. There was never a time in high school when a women mentor wasn't asking to meet with me and love on me. I still have fond memories of the movie, "Ever After" because of Michelle Beckman, or cook using balsamic vinegar because of Cassie Peterson. I'm so appreciative of their love and being that godly example of what a mother is supposed to be like, because I didn't have one. 

I reflect today and the past several months. I'm so blessed to be on that journey, because everything led me to where I am today. But I am more grateful that I understand my past journey and use them as life lessons for my family. 

Still today, I have to push those demons back and say, "Get behind me satan." I am constantly reminded that the devil prowls around looking for that little foothold in my life. But, overwhelmingly reminded that I am a beautiful and loved child of God through my own children, my husband, my friends, my church.

 Although I am far from perfect, I am confident, intelligent, and loved. I am accepted for who I am today by the only one who matters in this world! God has brought me through so much and because of my journey, I am a proud leader in many different venues, able to share my story and the many facets it entails. 

"The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save, He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with his love, He will rejoice over you with singing." Zephaniah 3:17

Resolve to know more

At the prime pregnancy age of 27, you don't imagine having any issues trying to conceive. Having a pretty regular cycle and being a healthy woman, why would there be any issues getting pregnant? 

This week is National Infertility Awareness week. What a great way to promote something that is looked as embarrassing or shameful. Infertility causes so many women heartache and pain. During all this heartache, there is so much confusion and questions. I believe it to be one of the most difficult things to go through.

I started sharing my story "anonymously" online back in 2011. I figured I could stay anonymous as I wanted all while sharing the details of my infertility journey. It wasn't until May 2013 that I started becoming vocal about the hardships my husband, Brian, and I had trying to conceive. 

Brian and I had tried for 7 months to conceive a child before my OB suggested we look into alternative ways to conceive. Since getting off the birth control pill in March, my body never resumed it's regular cycle. When we were told to try alternative ways, sure we did! We tried the Sperm Meet Egg plan. This plan basically requires you to use Ovulation Predictor kits and have sex every other day until you get that smiley face on the ovulation stick. It's almost a guarantee that the sperm will come in contact with your egg and fertilize..unless there are other issues.

Every alternative trick we tried didn't work. Sex became more of a chore, it wasn't fun anymore, and to be honest, I was starting to think something had to be wrong with me.

In November, after 2 additional months of alternative methods, we began seeing a fertility doctor. I had called my aunt who also struggled with conceiving, was this really the way I needed to get pregnant? She gave me hope because although her journey took 8 years, she had two successful pregnancies. Brian and I had our first consult meeting a few days after my talk with my aunt.

Dr. Trolice from Fertility CARE would guide us through our journey. After some initial blood work, we met with Dr. Trolice. We talked with him and started a casual conversation. We wanted to make sure there was a connection between us all, because let's face it, we were entrusting him with our next step in trying to conceive. After about an hour discussion, Dr. Trolice diagnosed me with with PCOS, poly-cystic ovarian syndrome. Basically, my eggs start to grow but never release and they turn into cysts. We had an ultrasound done to confirm his prediction and much to our dismay, my ovaries were filled with cysts. 

We then sat down and talked with Dr. Trolice again. He gave us a few options as to what we could do next. We wanted to get pregnant at the end of our journey with Dr. Trolice, so he wanted to check everything. 

During the next month, Brian and I went through what felt like hundreds of different tests. I had my tubes checked for any blockage with a hysterosalpingogram (HSG for short). Basically, blue dye was injected into my uterus and then he used an x-ray machine to verify that the dye was running through my reproductive organs. Brian had a semen analysis done. I had blood work every week to monitor different levels such as my thyroid levels. 

Once all of the testing was complete in December, we began a medicated cycle and timed intercourse in January. Everything was scripted and calculated out for us. I was checked even more than I was in December with ultrasounds at almost every visit. 

We began the medicated cycle with the lowest dosage of clomid (a medicine that promotes egg growth). You take this medicine for five days. Although you're supposed to take it on specific cycle days, since I wasn't ovulating, I could take it whenever during the month. After taking the medicine, I received an ultrasound to ensure my eggs were growing...which they weren't. I asked my nurse if we could try an additional supplement for another week before just scrapping this cycle and waiting another month. Thankfully, the nurse and Dr. Trolice approved. 

Our next step was to wait another week, while I took soy isoflavones. This pill is basically a natural version of clomid. It does the same thing as clomid, you can just purchase it over the counter. 

At our next visit, we thankfully had 1 mature egg to get us started. We also had another egg that was beginning to grow, but the nurse told us it most likely wouldn't be ready by the timed intercourse.

We went on the hope of 1 egg being mature enough! The next day, Brian had to give me the Ovidrel shot. This shot helps my ovaries release the egg. Generally, after giving the shot the egg will release within 24 hours. So, with the Ovidrel shot in my system, we were instructed to have timed intercourse that evening and 2 additional nights.

Then we wait. 

A lot of infertility is a waiting game. You try a new technique that you think will help you get pregnant, then you wait and pray that you will get a positive pregnancy test. 

Well, after 13 days of giving the Ovidrel shot, I was tired of waiting. I took a pregnancy test. I was devastated to learn it was negative. After all our hard work, after seeing one good egg and potentially another, it didn't work. The only encouragement I had was that after 13 days, the accuracy rate of a pregnancy test is around 60%. 

So we waited some more.

After 17 days of giving the Ovidrel shot, where the accuracy rate of a pregnancy test is more in the upper 80%, we tested. We got our first positive test! Oh blessed day! I remember taking the test and Brian waking up to wait for the test results. 

We confirmed 2 days later with our doctor that I was in fact pregnant. But the doctor had additional news...I was pregnant with two babies, twins! I just remember laughing at God's humor! 

Month after month of negative pregnancy tests, God had blessed us, actually, double blessed us! I went on to have a very successful pregnancy, I carried the twins to 38 weeks. The girls were both born at perfect weights (7 pounds and 8 pounds!). 

Although I had a great support system with my husband and nurses, I had to learn what was next all by myself. I had to educate myself about medications, terminology, and infertility. I share my story with others to let them feel comfortable with asking me questions.

I want others to know they are not alone in this journey.
I want people that brush off infertility as "stressing about it" to know that infertility is a medical concern. 
I want to help educate people in this journey about different options they can take.

I am passionate about infertility and supporting those around me with a listening ear or advice!

If you have any questions regarding National Infertility Awareness week, please visit:

• http://www.resolve.org/infertility101  (Basic understanding of the disease of infertility.)
• http://www.resolve.org/national-infertility-awareness-week/about.html (About NIAW)

Part 2 of the new Quigley's Quest!

     You now know that we are a family of 5. 

    We are still getting adjusted to having a newborn in the house. Gemma is definitely a lot different than Emily and Allison at this age. 

    Onto the news you're looking for, I'm sure! 

  After some discussion, praying, and calculating finances, we've made a decision. I am going to stay at home with all of the girls, starting...now! Yup, I will be a Stay at Home mom to 3 amazing little girls. I get to spend my working days with Emily, Allison, and Gemma! 

   When looking financially at day care or a nanny, the cost is at or above my total take-home pay. Day care for the twins (at 18 months old) would be $300 a week, then with a newborn is an additional $180-200; totaling $480-500 dollars a week. Outrageous! See, my entire paycheck in a month.

    Besides the cost, then we would have our children with someone else for 8 hours a day. I get it, some families have to do that. We just don't want to do it. We don't want to come home at 4:00 (5:30 for Brian), have to rush around to make dinner, bathe the girls, and put them down at 7:30; only getting 3 hours of time (and it's not even solid connection time, but broken up with nightly routine) with the girls. We want to be the primary source of education for the girls. I'll be able to teach, discipline, and play with my girls the way Brian and I want to. 

  It will be an adjustment financially. We are dropping to one income, losing roughly $40,000 a year. Thankfully, we just paid off our car with our tax return. We are practically debt free, minus the house and our newly-added medical bills. It can work.

   The only thing that would benefit me going to work would be health insurance. However, when you add in work stress and the time with the girls that we would lose from me working, it's not worth it. We will just look for private insurance (since we have to have insurance now) for the girls and me. 

   I'm looking forward to this new change! Being a stay at home mom is something I always wanted to become. If you know me, I have always felt that my first love is my family. Growing up I said that God created me to have a family and to be a mother. This is my true job. 

    These first few months with stay at home, we will pretty much do that, stay at home. Like I said before, I'm still adjusting and managing three little ones. So I'm doing anything that requires little packing, traveling, and freedom (for Emily and Allison). 

   I'm going to start getting involved in the MOPS group at Discovery and scheduling play dates with friends with kiddos. We are getting a small kid pool to keep us entertained during the summer months (as Emily and Allison love water). 

  I think as the girls get older and can be trusted more independently, it will be easier. That just makes sense. When I can say let's walk and the girls aren't running out into the road or trying to run away from me, of course it will be easier. They are almost there, so soon we should be able to venture out anywhere we'd like! 

   I told my principal my decision last week. I told her a lot sooner than I wanted to, but OCPS and CTA contract states if you're on medical leave you have to give your intent to return by March 15th. I was trying to contact her earlier in the week (to make sure if I went there she would be there), so she got a little confused as to why I was calling. I gave her a little heads up and then scheduled a meeting with her. It wasn't a complete blindside. She thought I'd prefer part-time, but after discussing that with her, even part-time wouldn't work. We would still have to pay for care for the girls. Of course, one or two teachers found out and now the rumors and all are storming the campus (but that's for a different time).

   Well, now you have it. The Quigley's new quest is maintaining our family with our adjusting circumstances. Continuing to trust that God will provide in any and all areas. God has walked with us in this journey of life already and we know He will continue!  <3